Save the Date
Procrastinate, who me? On the contrary, I’m compulsive and sometimes I act TOO soon, which I’ve learned can be just as problematic.
There was the time I got a save-the-date for the out-of-town, black-tie wedding of a friend’s son to be held on a date six months hence.
Save-the-dates don’t have reply cards or mine would have been in the mail that very day. But I immediately marked my calendar and rushed to the closet to try on my best cocktail dress, and then to check my husband’s tux.
Of course I wanted him to try it on, but it was a losing battle, “You want me to try on my tux for a wedding six months away,” he said, “are you outta your mind?”
But there was lots else for me to do – firstly of course the wedding gift to select. And as the ceremony was to be in Philadelphia we’d drive, so no plane reservations needed, but we would need a hotel for two nights. And I might see if there’d be time during the wedding weekend to see a childhood friend who now lives in Philly.
Googling the happy couple I found their requisite wedding website with their gift registry and lodging info. With a few clicks I sent the perfect gift, and with a phone call to the hotel I booked our room. Then I emailed my childhood friend and told her I’d see her in Philly in six months.
And a few days later I called the mother of the groom with my congratulations. “We’re delighted that you’re coming,” she said, “and what a surprise – your gift has come already, the very first and only one to arrive so far! You never procrastinate, do you!”
About a month later she called me back. “Sorry to tell you,” she said, “the wedding is off.”
And by the way the once happy couple never returned the gift, so I assume one of them is enjoying his or her morning coffee from a rather costly espresso machine.
– Dana Susan Lehrman
Dana Susan LehrmanThis retired librarian loves big city bustle and cozy country weekends, friends and family, good books and theatre, movies and jazz, travel, tennis, Yankee baseball, and writing about life as she sees it on her blog World Thru Brown Eyes!
www.WorldThruBrownEyes.com
Like you, Dana, I tend to not put things off (though I might not have sent that gift as quickly as you did). Sorry to hear the wedding never happened, though. Even worse, they didn’t return the gift! I know the bride may not return the engagement diamond, but to not return gifts is sort of rude, don’t you think? I have personally experienced your generous spirit and warm heart, so let me thank you again for that!
Aw shucks Betsy, thanx!
Ouch, it is possible to do things too soon, Dana (hence my selective procrastination), but you shouldn’t have been punished by a non-returned gift. Too bad that happened.
I guess that’s the way the cookie crumbles (with a cuppa!)
Wow, Dana, you really did do things too soon here. You didn’t even wait for the invitation, just acted when you got the save-the-date card. I had to laugh at your trying on your dress, and wanting your husband to try on his tux 6 months in advance. And all your preparations were in vain. After that I hope you waited until after the wedding to send your gift, just in case!
Yep Suzy, I learned my lesson!
Oops! That must have been hard for the couple who canceled too—but no excuse for not returning the gift! And what a great one! We got an espresso machine for a wedding present—the finest present by far and it is still treasured.
Hi to you and Sally from Danny too!
Enjoy the java!
I could see your punch line coming, Dana. Like you, I always put these things in my calendar, but having had this exact situation happen before, I hold off on the gift. Bad form to have kept it. I hope you at least received a thank you note.
No Laurie, no thank you note, but I figure they were too busy fighting and breaking up!
I know folks who are reliably late for everything, like late for the dinner reservation, late for the doctor’s appointment, late with the RSVP, late with the condolence note, late to the funeral, late to the show and then making a big ruckus as they get to their seat (if they are allowed in, which I hope they aren’t), late to pick up friends at the airport, late for their own plane and creating a storm of anxiety in their rush to get to the gate; displaying their neediness for attention by being late, their unwillingness to conform to the rules, their not caring if they disrupt others., etc. On the other hand, I am more comfortable with these types than I am with their opposites, the early birds, the pro-activists, the super organized ones, etc.. As to your amusing and engaging story, I was happy that you said you learned a lesson.
Thanx Jon!